Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Under Construction

I have made one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make. We all have things we desire and want. What do you do when you have to choose between the 2? As you all know I want a baby more than anything in this world, but I am to the point to where the Dr said do you want a baby now, or do you want to stop trying for a while, go back on the birth control and work on getting your body healthy and making a lifestyle change. Part of me says no, I want the baby now, knowing that I can possibly be pregnant in the next 3 weeks if I wanted makes me want to leap with joy, to jump up and down, to scream, to cry, but then there's the logical side of me that says, Brittany, you are young, loose weight now, while you can, it will only be harder after a child. So what do you do? I wish I could do both, but once I become pregnant I know that loosing weight isn't a option. So I have made the hardest decision by going back on the pill... The thought of the pill, freaks me out, but the Dr said that at any time I decide, I'M READY, I can quit taking it and within days start the fertility medication, so that is some what of a relief. For now the only agenda on my calender is involving healthy eating, working out, and mostly preparing my body for a safe and healthy pregnancy. So no kiddos from me for the next several months. My plan is to stick to weight watchers and then reassess myself in July. I would love to loose about 50lbs then quit the birth control, but we will see. Nothing is set in stone, and ultimately it's in God's hands. Please still be praying for me, this is something that is hard for me to do, when I have spent the last year trying to become pregnant to stop it now and focus on my health seems like the right choice, but how do I know for sure? I guess it just seems like the smartest choice to me! I guess for now, Brittany is "under construction."

I also want to wish the best of luck for The Higginbotham's, they will be welcoming their little cowboy Tucker tomorrow. Please keep them in your prayers for a safe and painless (thought i would throw that in there for ya Jen..) birthing.

Until next time,



Jaime said...

I'm very proud of you. I know this is probably the most difficult decision you've had to make. But like you said... you're young.. there is still plenty of time. If you take care of you first it will be a much better experience in the long run for you... and healthier.... pregnancy does a toll on your body that I never realized till I went through it. I can't wait till I get the phone call that your pregnant... it WILL be just a matter of time... God's time. :) Always praying... Love you much!!

Jennifer said...

Thank you so much for the well wishes & thoughts for tomorrow. I'm filled with every emotion possible.

As for your choices...just don't lose your faith that God is completely in control. I agree with the doc, weight is MUCH harder to face after becoming a mom. Just use the next few months to pray about the situation and listen for God to speak to you. In HIS time, He'll answer your prayers to become a mother. We just have to learn to be patient, it's easier said then done but His time is far better then ours.

God bless you & Good luck!

AmyT said...

I think you made the right decision...just remember everything is in God's time anyway :-) Besides - speaking from expierence..it is very hard to lose weight after the baby...now after my first it wasn't bad - I got back into shape pretty easy (I was a good size before getting prego) but after my 2nd....I got prego with the 3rd (not planned) it was VERY hard to lose the weight. So take care of yourself..and God will handle the rest!!!!!!! I'll still be praying for you!